The Night Before

Well, here it is finally. The night before our departure to Kenya, we {my dad and I} are headed back to Tumaini Children's Home. As you might imagine, I'm experiencing every emotion possible. Let's start with the panic I experienced this morning.

I've been in contact with Bishop David, the man in charge of Glory Outreach Assembly, since June when I first booked the tickets. Through our communications, we decided that he or his son would pick us up from the airport, take us to their house where we would spend the night, head to the market for some shopping the next morning and then make our way to Tumaini. That was the plan, short and sweet (was is key word there). About 2am, I started tossing and turning and wasn't sure why. Finally after getting out of bed, I realize that Bishop David had sent me an email. The time stamp on it was 2:15am.

Jordan,

My son Timothy have had to travel North Western Kenya to train young leaders who we call History Makers. The need for training there has been overwhelming so he was forced to extend his stay. I'm extremly exhaused after a series of trainings and minisrty opportunities that I have had in the last several weeks. If I regain my strength, I would still pick you up at the airport. If I continue feelng as weak as I'm now I may not be able to. So I have asked Pauline to be the back up plan. If I'm unable to come, Pauline will send you a driver by the name Hanniel Njeru. He will bring you to my house for accomodation. In the morning of Dec.17th, I know you would like to do shopping as you had indicated, before heading out to Tumaini. I'm extending an invitation to you if you would like to join us to Ruiru maximum prison where we will be sharing the Gospel, food and Christmas gifts with 450 prison inmates . If you joined us for this prison ministry, then you would leave for Tumaini after shopping and prison ministry to get there in the evening. If you choose to keep your original plans, then we shall leave our house together in the morning as we go for prison ministry and you go for shopping.

A question for you. If we had our friends in Atlanta sending you to bring Christmas gifts for the prison ministry, would you have room to bring them with you? What the prisoners needs are things like washing soap, tooth brushes, tooth pastes, tissue papers, coca colas and bread.

Regards,
Bishop David

So....as you can see, the plans have completely changed and that's why I was tossing and turning. If we didn't want to go to the prison, he offered, we would be dropped off in the market to shop by ourselves, just me and my dad...as white as can be. Mzungu's as they call us.

I scrambled. I didn't know what to do. I do not feel comfortable in a prison here in the US, much less in a foreign country. I sure as heck don't feel comfortable shopping in a market by ourselves. After 2 calls to Kenya and a short stint of panic to find a hotel, we thanked Bishop David for his help and services, but have changed our plans. Well, changed them back to the original plan.

As I sit here on my couch, with the air conditioner on {imagine that in the middle of December} I'm thinking about how excited I am to see the children. How antsy I am to hurry up and get there. How nervous I am because it's just my dad and I and I planned this all on my own. How much anxiety I have, because as I type this, we do not "officially" have a place to stay our first night in Nairobi. And I'm sad. I'm sad because I know leaving this time around will be even harder than it was the first time. Sometimes, I find myself letting that sadness set in and overtake the happiness that I'm supposed to feel first.

I don't know how I'll react when it comes time to come home. I know there will be tears, there will be smiles, there will be runny noses, and I definitely will leave even more of my heart there than I did the first time. I'm not going back to get the piece I left there, I'm going to give more of my heart to the children of Tumaini. I feel like they are my children.